21st December 2016

Getting on with People & What to do when it all Goes Wrong.


photo by Mauro Mora

Getting on with People & What to do when it all Goes Wrong.

So here’s the thing:

No matter how hard you try (if that’s your thing) there’s no way you’re always going to get on with everyone you meet.

Starting out on the Right Foot.

If you want to start off on the right foot at college, uni, new job etc, here are 11 pointers to help when it comes to getting along with people. Follow and make your days at school/uni/college/work easier.

  1. Smile – probably the most important one in the list. It doesn’t mean you are flirting, it means you are showing people you are friendly and open to communication.
  2. Be polite and friendly to everyone you meet, even passing in the corridor/lift etc just try to acknowledge people as you pass them.
  3. Adopt positive body language – arms open instead of crossed etc will make you appear more approachable.
  4. Say hello and good morning etc to people – it works wonders and allows for response allowing you to figure out what kind of mood your friends/colleagues are in today!
  5. Try not to isolate yourself, be a team player. If this isn’t really your bag make a special effort every now and then to remind people you are there. Yes its exhausting, especially if you’re not great at small talk but its a necessary part of creating a harmonious environment.
  6. Volunteer to help at every opportunity, this includes doing a tea run. Tea and coffee are very important to a lot of people and the kitchen or canteen isn’t really that far away…
  7. Bring cake? Speaks for itself really ; )
  8. Find a common interest with people. Its then pretty easy to go into small talk mode when you need to.
  9. Give credit where its due and don’t lie. People appreciate honesty when something goes wrong.
  10. Don’t make fun of people its not a good idea to be seen as the bully.
  11. Don’t gossip. Never, ever, never.

What to do when it all goes wrong.

If for whatever reason someone takes a dislike to you it can make life difficult to say the least. If you want to put things right follow these steps to help try and unravel the whole thing. You’ve got to be brave.  It WILL be awkward and most people don’t like confrontation or if they do they just want to have an argument for the sake of it. Awesome.

  1. Figure out what the actual problem is or if its not completely obvious to you.
  2. Approach the person you have trouble with directly and find out what the problem is.
  3. Stay cool & professional – no  need for screaming or fighting.
  4. Provide an incentive to improve your relationship eg if we work together we will get credit from or be able to do this faster. Try to remember that people aren’t always brought together to get on. Especially in the work place. you’re there to do a job so you may have to accept that you will never have a close relationship with this person. So long as you can communicate effectively when you work together etc it will make life a lot easier.
  5. Look for possible solutions together or on your own or if they’re not up for that.
  6. Try to remedy the situation yourself first before approaching teachers/management.
  7. Ask for advice. People not directly involved sometimes have a better handle on what’s actually going on.
  8. You can never win with gossip. It doesn’t help anyone by spreading ‘he said’ / ‘she said’ rumours. Even if the information you shared was true by the time it gets back to the other person the Chinese Whispers effect will have changed it completely.
  9. Try to see the positive if you can. What can you gain from the experience?

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